Saturday, May 30, 2009

Hey everybody,

I'm so glad to be home. Work was super busy, but it was one of those days where it's busy at every hour. So one hour it's slow, the next hour is busy. Kinda sucks, cause I rather have it busy all at once ^^ This morning I woke up 9.30 am, got ready, and went to downtown to do some shopping :) I havent gone shopping since finals week, and today was such a relieve! I got a cute peacock headband from urban outfitters, and a top from Abercrombie, but it was too big so I have to go back tomorrow to return it. ahhh, I should have tried it on before purchasing it. That's what I get for being in a rush! Tomorrow is another long day for me. I have to wake up at 6am tomorrow for music practice at 7 am for church. aaah, so early. why Adam? why 7 am? why not 8am? hehehe. I hope I can wake up, cause sometimes my alarm clock doesnt ring at all even though I already turn it on! I need a "live" wake up call!

These couple of days Ive been undergoing a major crisis, a.k.a "cankersore". It hurts to the max. It's so painful and disturbing. I cant even eat anything that is flavourful, big, and chewy cause it hurts so bad. A couple of days ago, I went to Chipotle with my friend and bought a burrito and I couldnt even eat that big thing! I gave it to my sis....Yesterday, I ate shabu2, and it was so painful because the sauce was so citrusy. What else? Today, I ate green curry for dinner and couldnt stop tearing up because it was so flavourful that it hurts my cankersore so bad. :( Just when one is healing, I have another one in my tounge. Sorry if this talk is disturbing, but I think its my dentist fault! haha... No, I think I just need to drink more water. Also, I tend to bite my tounge alot so I guess that's why? Ok enough of this talk. I hope it will heal soon, because I can't even smile :/

Thursday, May 28, 2009

My Obsession of the Day #2


I think I'm going to start having "My Obsession of the Day" entries, because I have so much cravings from time to time...haha.
My favorite snack lately has been a avacado smoothie. Its's yummy, healthy, and its so easy to make. :) Avocado is rich in magnesium that reduces risk of excess belly fat, high blood pressure, high cholesterol and high blood sugar. If you have cholesterol, avacado is a good source of diet. Here is my avacado smoothie recipe (you can find them online, but this is the way I make them. Every recipe is quite alike. Told u its simple!):
-1 large avocado (add more avocado, depending how much you want to make)
-2 teaspoon milk
-1 cup of ice
-sugar (eye ball it)
Blend everything, and you got yourself a yummy avocado smoothie!
I honestly dont follow this recipe. I go by it, but I usually just eyeball how much sugar, ice, milk and avocado I put in. Put as much or as little as depending on your taste. It really isnt hard to make at all, you just need some dedication for avocados! yum ^^

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

5 Things that gross me out

There are probably not a lot of things that disgusts or gross me out, but these are 5 things that I find really disgusting. Here goes:

1.) Mice/insects- Anything that has to do with little insects such as bugs, cockroaches, spiders- you name it, gross me out so much! I hate looking at them and being near them. Speaking about it already gives me the itch. Mice also grosses me out. I just dont see why some people find them cute? Rats, mouse....I find them disgusting. I used to live in a house that has many mice, oh gosh, it was disgusting. I cant stand looking at their tails. It freaks me out...

2.) Public Restroom-Most, not all, public restroom grosses me out. If it was a 5-star hotel, or even say a regular hotel, and a nice fancy restaurant, then I dont mind using their restrooms. BUT, if it was mall or a fast food public restroom, I rather not use them. I dont understand why some people do not flush. I mean, I understand it's a public restroom and it is supossed to stink and what not, but please flush. It's not so hard to flush and clean after yourselves, right? ^^

3.) Old men hitting on young girls- I truly truly cant stand seeing old men hitting on young girls. Like I said before, I work in a restaurant, and from time to time, I would get a wink wink, a stare, or a flirty smile from old men. Let me tell you how disgusting it is. Seriously, it's disturbing. I also find guys that already has girlfriends flirting and just staring at other girls very disturbing. It grosses and freaks me out. They should be ashamed of themselves. If you're not satisfied with one girl, then you shouldnt even be in a relationship. I get these alot as well, it just bothers me, because if my boyfriend did that, I'll probably flush him down the drain. Oh yes, I have good eyes. :)

4.) Baggy Pants-Guys with saggy baggy pants to the point that shows their boxers grosses me out. If you wanna show your boxers then you might as well not wear any pants at all? I dont if it's just me, but I dont it attractive at all. It's actually a turn off. Oh, and you know what's funny? Their walk. You know when your pants are saggy, you're not able to walk properly right? Well, their walk is pretty annoying. I guess they find it attractive, I dont know. I just dont see it.

5.) Smokers/druggies- I dont want to offend anyone, but I find people who smokes really grosses me out. I cant stand the smell, I just cant stand being anywhere around smokers. I just find it pointless to buy cigarettes, its expensive and its bad for you. umm, doesnt that ring a bell? Anyway, enough of this talk. Dont want to offend anyone now. As for druggies, I'm not usually around druggies, cause I dont have friends who doesnt them, but people who does drugs does gross me out. Their smell, their actions, everything.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Summer time...

It's my first week of summer and I'm already loving it. :) Actually, in some ways I'm enjoying it and in another way I'm not. I love being able to wake up late and not worry about rushing to class, but one thing I dislike about summer is not having anything productive to do. On Monday for instance, I stayed in the whole day doing pointless things such as browsing in the net, laying in bed, and watching tv! You see!? I remembered being in front of my tv for almost 7 hours straight. It's unbelievable. I could have went out, but my friends had work, some in Indo already, and its freezing out....so I guess I should`nt complain right? ^^

I'm still deciding what to do for summer. I'm waiting for Jastien to finish so we can finally decide what to do. So I made a list of what may come this summer :)

1.) Camping in Angel Island (camped here once, its beautiful...)
2.) San Diego (I've been wanting to go SD since December, but never had the chance to!!!!)
3.) L.A again? (never seem to get enough of this city!)
4.) Disney World I (Would be my dream come true to come here again. I've always wanted to go here. Been here once when I was very little but forgot everything.)
5.) Indo` (This was my actual plan to go back, but I'm still deciding whether or not I should go this summer or december. It's pretty late to buy the ticket now since it will get even more expensive especially now that it's summer, but well see.)

So there's my list...I dont think I would be able to go to all 5 places, but I do hope I can go to at least 2/5 places I listed up there. hahaha...For some reason, my plans never work out. Dont know why....You know what's odd? Whenever I plan something, either it doesnt turn out the way I expected it to be, or it just never happens. But when I dont plan, most likely that event will happen. Wierd, huh? Thought so. :/

I'm amazed that it's been weeks since I thought of what I thought was going to be hard to forget. There were many times I wondered why I kept thinking about it all those days, but these few days I've thought of all the possibilities that I should forget it completely, and to my surprise, there is so many things I found that makes me want to let go. Honestly, it was'nt worth it. I think the only reason why I kept holding on was because I liked the feeling. I enjoyed remembering every single thing, because for me, it was precious. But if I remember the opposite of the enjoyment, there was probably more that I can list than the enjoyment feeling.

I'm truly happy and glad to be in the place in here right now. Sometimes I tend to forget and take things for granted, like what I have isnt enough and felt like what I needed was more, but I had the wrong mindset. I'm truly happy that things ended up the way it did, and honestly, thank God I was not stuck there because I would not be able to be loved the way I am loved right now.
I think everyone has their moments. Sometimes it takes time to realize the truth, and right now, I've realized the truth. This time, I'm 100% over with u for sure. Thanks God!

Friday, May 22, 2009

Accepting yourself.

Accepting who you are as a person can be tough at times. I'm not perfect, in fact, nobody is. Sometimes I wish I was taller, have a better body, and the list goes on and on, but all these things that we want and hope for is all imaginary. There are times where I feel like I'm not good enough, not just physically but emotionally. Sometimes I feel like I could have done better, or I maybe feel like I wish I was this or that. BUT, these things doesnt change you as a person. You keep complaining, but the truth is no body is perfect. Everyone has their flaws, and everyone would want to change something about themselves. Let me make this clear. Everyone has something in them that they lack, something that they want to have. Isn't that true? Humans are never and will never be satisfied. We will always want more and more. If I can say that humans are greedy and selfish, I can assure you that humans are 100% greedy and selfish. Well, technically we are.

I've been learning to accept myself as an individual. You know that saying, "you have to love yourself first before you love anyone else"? Well, that saying is true. I love myself, I care about my own being (dont take that in a wrong way), but there are things about me that I wish I can change. Traits, personality, and physically...I just wish I can get what I want. If there is one thing I'm good at, that is complaining. Sometimes it's hard to accept who I am, but I realize that I must accept myself for who I am. God created me in my own special way, and complaining is the same thing as saying God's creation is horrible. I realized that by complaining, I'm hurting God. I'm learning to accept myself as an individual, and to love myself the way I am. I'm beautiful in my own way and I know for one that my inner beauty is indeed more beautiful and important than the exterior. Thanks God for opening my eyes. But above all, thank you for allowing me to be a strong individual.

Monday, May 18, 2009

I`m so mad that my webcam isn`nt working properly! I thought that now my computer is working fine and now that it's fast, it'll let me make videos, but turns out its still nagging on me!!! aaaaaaaaaaa, im so mad! I tried making one earlier this morning, and when I played the video it was slow. When I talk its not following my lips. It's just nagging, its so slow I cant stand it!!!

2 more days until summer and I'm somewhat excited. I just want to get over with finals. Well, then after that, its the waiting game: the grade.

time for dancing with the stars, and bachelorette!! ahh so excited!

til then,
jes

Monday, May 11, 2009

break time...

I've been sitting in front of the computer screen for the past 4 hours listening to my marketing lecture and trying to get a perfect score on these quizzes. I have finals this week and next week. I hate finals week. Who enjoys it anyway? I'm trying to keep a smile on my face, and pretend to enjoy it because I dont wanna have a negative view! This is the time where I need some positivity and encouragment because right now, my grades are on stake. Did i say that right? heheh ^^ I think I'm doing pretty well in my classes so far, but finance is really killing me, I just wish I was good at math. Let me take that back. I dont mind the math. As long as there is a formula and a way to solve it, I'm fine. But, its the concept that is so difficult and hard to grasp (at least for me). I thought I was really good with concepts, but turns out that I'm not with finance. But to be honest, this semester was by far the best semester I've experienced in my University so far. Maybe it's because I had the focus, or maybe it's because I'm doing pretty well. hehe...Anyways, tomorrow is gonna be long day. I'm working on a finance stock valuation project with my classmate. Were doing it on AIG. I dont understand stock at all, or how it works and what not, but after doing some reasearch, its pretty interesting and quite entertaining. I dont think I'll get myself into buying stocks though. Ok, enough of education.

alrightt, im gonna go back studyingg... :/

Saturday, May 09, 2009

Marriage

I'm not married, nor am I close to getting married. It is probably the biggest and longest decision that I'll ever have to make when the time comes. So why write about marriage, considering that I'm not even married yet? I couldn't find a greater answer other than the fact that I've always been interested in this topic itself. I'm no expert, I still have alot to learn, so you may or may not agree with me, and that's okay. These are simply just my opinion, and it can change overtime. Shall we start?

Marriage might seem to be simple to some people, but we all know it isn't as simple as 1,2,3. First, we got the wedding, the honeymoon phase, then after all that good stuff, comes the real marriage life. If I were to describe what marriage really is in one simple sentence, it will be, "either the marriage is successful or a failure." What is a successful marriage though? Well, I can't really answer that because I'm not married, and even though if I was married, I dont think I would be able to give you a concrete answer. I don't think a married couple can answer that either. I think the only person that can answer that question is a couple that has been married and retired; a.k.a when you're old. Why? Because they've been through it all. Through thick and thin, and and through all the gutters possibly imagined.

Even though I can't answer "what is a successful marriage", a couple things I do know is that a successful marriage requires commitment, communication and trust. I think a lack in one of those criterias is the ultimate cause of a divorce. Commitment, communication and trust is the foundation to any relationships. Even before getting married, I believe that these 3 criterias need to occur first. You need commitment, because without commitment there is sinply no relationship. Commitment does not only require you to commit your whole being to your spouse, but it is sacrificing and dedicating your life to them. It also requires time. If you're one of those workaholics that works day and night, I don't suggest you to get married! Marriage also needs communication. Misundertandings and misconmunications can also lead to divorce. You need communication period. Trust is probably the most important criteria in a marriage. Without trust, there is no commitment, and vice versa. Trust is the foundation of any relationship.

Now, here comes the juicy part. Divorce! So what really causes divorce? I think a lack of either commitment, communication and trust is the cause of divorce. Americans tend to believe that divorce is okay. I dont know how many times that I've heard celebrity news on divorce. It just seems that divorce in this country is considered to be "okay" and a "normal" thing. It's like a trend, you know? One season you get married, the next season you divorce. It seems to be a hot trend in America. I think one of the most important thing that people need to remember is that no one is perfect. Every individual is different, and there will always be differences between two people, so work it out! You might not see it in the boyfriend/girlfriend phase, but sooner or later you`ll see it, especially in marriage. As much differences, disagreements and arguements a couple might encounter, divorce is just not acceptable. You got yourself into this, so deal with it! grow up!!! If yall are not ready to get married, then dont! If you dont think he/she is a match, then dont get married! You married people reading my blog might be thinking, "this girl is a child! she doesnt know nothing!" I might not know everything, and yes, all divorce cases are different and maybe people wont ever understand your case, but getting a divorce certainly does not solve anything. You're probably making it worse, especially if you have children.

Here comes the part for all the women out there :) Again, this is just my opinion. Here goes: ALL GUYS ARE JERKS. No matter what, in all circumstances, in all cases, guys will always be guys. If a hot sexy women is flirting or being seductive, and your guys sees it, wouldnt he be attracted or tempted? I bet you you a million dollars he would. Dont be stupid ladies! Stop being naive, and face the truth! I know trust is the number #1 thing you MUST MUST do in any relationship or marriage, I'm not saying not to trust them. You can trust them 110%, but dont be blind. If your husband is constantly coming home late from work everyday, that should be a hint that something fishy is going on. Guys will always be guys! There will always be temptation in them, and I guess I can say this goes to women as well. Cheating on your spouse is just unacceptable. I think many divorce cases deals all because one of the spouce is cheating with somebody else.

Overall, marriage is beautiful, but I'm certainly not ready for it yet! NOT AT ALL. I still have so much to accomplish, so much I want to do for myself before I plan on settling down. I think the most important thing us women, or men as well, need to remember is that we need to find our own goals, and reach them. dream big. Theres no price for dreamig. Have a vision, and set goals to accomplish them, because once you are married, you are living a whole different life and you may not be able to do the things you want to do. As for me, I'm living my life day by day, and achieving my dream and be a millionaire. :) hahaha, just kidding...

Hope this helps...

Blessd day,
Jess

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

speechless

Last night, I dreamt that I surrounded by empty coffins in the cemetary. It was so weird, and honestly, I felt so scared in my dream. I could almost feel like it was real. Coffins are my biggest fear; my phobia. I didnt know what that dream was trying to tell me, because I've never dreamt of something so odd like. I mean, coffins would be the last thing I would want to talk about, especially at night! Blogging about this just makes me shiver! Just a couple minutes ago, I searched on google the interpretation of coffins in dreams, and it says that when you dream of empty coffins, it means "to let go of something that has already died." That totally hit me. It really did...

I'm letting go.

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

What a day!

I just got home an hour ago from class, and I'm so so tired. I honestly never felt this exhausted after coming home from class. Maybe it's because I've been out the whole day, and its raining outside... just made me all tired and icky. I dont know why, but lately I've been getting back aches and pain on my shoulders as well. I think perhaps I slept the wrong way? Or maybe I cracked a bone? I feel it in my sleep though, its like I dont sleep comfortable. Whenever I turn to the right or left, I feel so "pegel". My mom is a chef and as a chef, back aches and pain in her body is a normal thing for her. She's been to many massage therapists but none seems to take an effect on her. Last couple of weeks, she recommended me to this one massage therapist, an old chinese lady that lives in Hayward. She massages your body for a good 2 hours for 40 bucks. I think its pretty worth it. I really need a Professional or an Expert to massage my body! I think it's also because I work as a hostess/waitress in a fast paced restaurant environment, and usually by the end of the day, my body feels like it has been beaten by a muscular guy or something.

Another thing, I dont know why, but me and coffee just does`nt get along well. Yet, I still drink it! You see, I'm so stubborn!!! I know its bad for me, I also know my body doesnt function well when I drink coffee, but I still drink it anyways. My boyfriend calls me stubborn. I think I can finally admit that yes, I am stubborn. I drank a grande ice coffee from starbucks this afternoon, and usually I'm okay, but today they were promoting this new ice coffee with milk for $1.45 if I'm right, and so I thought why not? I never payed attention to the price anyway cause ice coffee is usually cheap, but I wanted to try it because instead of pouring your own milk, they blend it in for you. A few hours after enjoying my ice coffee, I started to feel this ill-feeling inside of me. I started shaking and felt like my heart was pounding and beating faster than it normally would. A couple hours flew by, and my friend and I decided to get an early dinner before my class at 7, and he suggested we share a strawberry margarita. I promised him to sip a little bit of it just because I've never really tried a margarita before. (I know what you might be thinking! I dont drink alcohol much. I only drink when its the right occasion. The only alcohol bev` I drink is wine) Anyway, when I took my first sip, it tasted like a normal strawberry slurpee, so I got addicted to it! I drank half glass of the margarita, and the glass was pretty big too. Usually when I drink alcohol, my shoulder starts to hurt. Dont ask me why. I dont even know. My friends all say I'm lightweight(sp?), meaning I cant consume much alcohol or something like that. A couple hours later, the coffee mixed with the margarita started to take a whole effect on my body! I started feeling so weak. But aside from that, I cant blame coffee and margarita, I think that my body is very sensitive and needs more milk and vitamins. I dont drink vitamins at all. I consume my vitamin C from drinking OJ and milk from eating cereal, but I know that isnt enough to make me healthy, because it's not everyday that I drink OJ and eat cereal. I made a promise today that I should start taking vitamin C and calcium. Consuming calcium will help your muscles and bones to be stronger. It also helps your cardiovascular system. I wanna live a healthy life! I wanna live long, and I sure want my bones and muscles to be strong so I dont have back pains and what not when I get old! I know many old people, including my grandparents that are enduring such pain like back aches, and maybe that's because they didnt take their vitamins when they were young. I finally realized that it starts now. You are what you eat. So try to eat healthy, and take vitamins and also exercise, because you will defintely benefit from it in the future. :)

Wowww, I just realized that I wrote alot for a blog! ^^ hehe.. I think that's it for now. Gonna get some rest. Must wake up early tomorrow for study session n class. goodnite :)

Blessd day,
Jess

Monday, May 04, 2009

no internet

Hey everybodyy,

I'm using my sister's computer because for some odd reason, my internet wont seem to work in my laptop. I dont know what's wrong, or who has been using my computer while I was in LA! Speaking of LA, my trip was a blast. I spend 3 days and 2 nights there. I love the city, though I gotta admit that I hate HATE the traffic and how its so hard to get anywhere. I can never stand traffic. I hung out with a couple of friends and went to a beamerfest in Santa Barbara, which was okay. This morning when I woke up, it was so hard to wake up! I'm still in that vacation mode, just wish I had more of it :( But....back to reality jessica!

I only had one class in the morning today, and my friend asked me if I wanted to watch Wolverine with him, so I did. I didnt like the movie. From the storyline to the action, I just dont get it? I dont like it. Especially the ending. I dislike endings that leaves you with a question mark. Apparently, that movie kept me a sense of hanging and questioning what happened to who and who. But, it turns out that this movie was a flashback of some sort from the beginning. I dont understand! If i was to give it a rating from 1-5, I'll give it a 3. I would give it a 1, but there were some hotties in the movie :) haha...

Today is pretty gloomy, but not too cold or windy. At least its not raining!! I kind of like this weather. Its good for a change, cause its been warm these past couple of weeks. Today was my early priority registration date and I was able to add classes up to 8 units, and boy was I amazed to get 3 classes registered! I hope by July Ill get the rest of the classes that need. I dont know what else to say...I guess I'll be tweeting for now until my internet is fixed. :/

Until then bloggers....



its been a hard, but I think I'm finally overcoming it..