Just an update. (:

It's been a while since I blogged. I'm trying to manage my time so I can blog regularly, but with school and assignments in the way, it won't be so often :(

So far, school is doing alright. Not much going on, just a whole bunch of reading and online assignments. Let me tell you I haven't been reading. This is so not me, and I'm not proud of my behavior! I don't think lazy is the word, but I guess I just haven't got my 100% full motivation back. I think I'm still in vacation mode. Whatever it is i need to get my act togeather! On the other hand, I feel like I'm constantly on iLearn's website 24/7. It's ridiculous and disgusting. life is great! Positive! (:

It's really weird how this semester started. I never knew it would end this way, but turns out that things are not meant to last forever.

Goodnight everyone! (:



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I really miss my family back in Indonesia. I miss my grandma. I miss my grandpa. I miss my aunt and uncles. I miss my maid. But most if all, I miss thus little girl


When I was in Jakarta, she didn't want to eat, shower, studie with her mom or with the maid. The only person she wanted to be with was me. I've learned to be patient with little kids--trust me, it's not easy. Going back home reminds me how important family really is. You can lose your spouse, bf, or job..but you can never lose your family. When I was in Jakarta for 3 weeks, I got to spend with most of my family members from both my mom's and dad's side. When I came back to the US, I felt a sense of loss. It's like I've got nobody here beside my mom and dad and my grandma. I miss being around my bigger part of the family. It really sucks that they are so far away from me. don't laugh at me, but there were nights where I had tears running down my cheeks because I miss them so much. But knowing that their happy makes me happy and that's all it matters.


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"don't bite more than you can chew"

Spring semester just started yesterday, and I'm already feeling the pressuring kicking in. I thought last semester was hard, but after the first day of class and reading the syllabus, I can say this semester is a whole lot harder. Ugh, did I mention 4 of my classes requires forming groups for this group project and presentation? I don't mind presenting or doing the project-- that's not what I'm complaining about. It's the group part. I don't hate it, but knowing the fact that I'll have to meet with 4 different groups for 4 different classes throughout the semester is kinda painful. I'm kinda the type of person who likes to do things on my own, and not rely on people cause you know you can never trust anybody. Doesn't mean I don't get along with people, it's just that I prefer working alone when it comes to education. I know some people who feels the same way. :) anyways, I shouldn't even be complaining. I got all the classes I need without the need go beg and plead. haha. (sorry for my many grammatical errors in this blog)

Gonna head to bed! Goodnight guys (:


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It's been a while since I blogged. I got back from Indonesia last week, and I gotta admit, I miss my family so much. I wish I stayed there longer. It's so hard to leave the ones you love the most, especially knowing the fact that you barely see them. Thanks to facebook and international texting, I'm able to communicate with them. Lol :)

School is starting tomorrow. Whooopah. I'm so not excited. In a way I'm ready to get back on track and start being productive again, but a part of me knows how crazy this semester is gonna be, that's probably the reason why I don't wanna start school! Omg, books are super duper expensive. It's unbelievable. Another reason why I hate school!

Alright, gonna get my beauty sleep. Gotta look fab on the first day right? Haha :) kidding.

Night guys


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If there is one thing I'm not good at, it would be hiding my feelings. I don't think I'm capable of hiding my feelings or put a smile on my face when really I'm not feeling happy. It's easy for someone to say that when they got a problem, its easy for them to hide that emotions and simply put a smile on their faces, acting as though nothing is going on. I can't do that. I've been trying to focus with my finals tomorrow, but I can't even focus a bit. All my friends are telling me how a fool I am for being in the situation that I'm in and for letting it eat up my emotions, but I feel like I rather feel this way then denying it to myself and act as if everything is alright when deep down I'm suffering. I rather feel miserable now then denying it to myself and feel miserable later. Feel me? haha...Oh gosh, why am I even blogging? It's 3am right now, and I should be in bed cause I need to wake up at 6am today, but I felt like blogging (:

What am I supposed to do? I hate hate hate this sucky feeling. I hate it that much that I gotta put that hate 3 times. A part of me wants to believe and listen to whatever my friends are telling me, but a part of me wants to just shut everybody down and listen to myself. I'm torn in between and I hate this situation I'm in. So much hate right? Gosh, I feel like a crazy women right now. No idea.

Ugh, I really hate this. (guess how many times I've said that today?)

“Life is uncharted territory. It reveals its story one moment at a time.” Leo Buscaglia

not my kind of day...

Today is such a crappy day. I basically studied for my finals the whole day and finished up my paper. I'm still studying right now, but bleh, I need a break! I'm not getting anything right now. It's so frustrating. I've been trying to read this book for I don't know how many hours? And I'm still not getting it, and OH my exam is on thursday!

Today is really not my kind of day. I wish I can just sleep this off and wake up to rainbows and sunshines. haha, yeah, you get what I mean.