What Makes Me Happy

There are actually many things that makes me happy and makes my life everyday beautiful. From family to education, to even the smallest things such as getting a new haircut or new shoes or simply having a nice cup of coffee in the morning. Little things makes a difference and for me, and it truly makes me very happy. Lately, I've been seeing life through a whole different perspective. I've realized once more that life is too short and too precious. Sometimes I dont realize it. Everyday I become more grateful and gracious to have family who loves me, friends who I can rely on, an education that I can benefit later in the future, but most of all, I am mostly thankful for my health. Not a lot of people are fortunate to have a healthy life, and I am one the billions of people who have a healthy life. That, I am so thankful of. It breaks my heart to see people with certain disease, especially those that are incurable. Sometimes I question myself why God chose these things to happen to human beings? I wonder why there is such things of disease. After all, He is the creator of everything here on earth. Why did He create them? No one is perfect, but why have a innocent people die from diseases they shouldnt have? These questions, I wish I knew the answers. But then again, there are no answers to everything. I guess that's just the way life is; unpredictable. Therefore, I am cautious, more aware. I've also learned to take life seriously. I've also learned to take people more seriously, and to love and cherish each and every relationship and friendship I have. Have you ever heard of the saying, "once they leave you, that's when you miss them the most." Well, its true. You never know when your friend of family, or someone special leaves you. Sometimes God takes the most precious people away from you. Someone that you thought never would leave you, leaves you. Little things like this, things that I would never think of everyday has caused me to think life through a different level. Sometimes, as humans, we forget these things. We tend to focus more on materials, and what is in front of us, when the most important thing we should be thinking of is the little things. Am I confusing you? ahh, I think I am. I dont think that sentence even made sense!

I think I've said this on twitter, but if there is one thing in life that I've learned, that is-- to never regret and dwell on the past. This is something that I've been trying hard not to do. I think for me, as a person, I'm overwhelmingly too sensitive. I analyze every bit of everything. Its a bad thing, you know. Dont get me wrong. I'm not an EMO person. I live a happy life. I'm cheerful and perky most of time, but there would be nights when I lay there in bed not being able to sleep, that is when thoughts start popping up. I questioned myself why in the world should I be thinking of it? I tried many times to avoid it, to ignore it. I've dreamt of it a couple times, though the dream doesnt seem to tell me anything. Usually a dream would have a story line of some sort, but these dreams of mine that I've been having from time to time does not have story line. Instead, its just there. Its like the wind, you know? You cant see it, but you can feel it. I think I can relate my dream to the wind. I cant see it, I cant picture it, and I cant tell a story from it, but I can feel it. I honestly dont think there is any purpose at all for me to be thinking about it. If I look back in the past, and saw the things that has happen and how they happened as a whole, I feel a sense of stupidty for thinking about it. Beacause it was hurtful. But somehow, I dont care. I dont think about it. All I think about is the sweet memories. This is probably just something I have to fight for...I dont think it is any easier for me. I dont think I can ever last one day without having it on my mind. I guess this is something I have to deal with everyday...